Ah garage sales; a weekend pursuit for the thrifty, dumping ground for the unwanted and a tradition firmly embedded in Australian life for those of us wanting to get rid of all our shit. Apparently as the saying goes, “one person’s trash is another’s treasure.” Thank God because we have a lot of “trash”.
While we’d been living in Canada and Shrimp and Brendon had been living in the UK, we had all stored our precious possessions that on closer inspection were less on the precious side and more on the “what the hell was I thinking” side. On top of that, Mum and Dad had at least 2 houses worth of stuff they no longer needed. It was evident a mass purging was required, giving way to our illustrious garage sale.
Some notable gems on sale included a frog green jar resembling a solidified frog green vomit complete with the obligatory carrot chunks, a mouldy Cabbage Patch Kid doll by the name of Edith and a couple of lamp shades that dated circa 1845. Oh, and I also found my old touch football shoes that I’d been previously looking for when I started playing touch again.
Just a hint, be sure to have any R rated items being sold out of reach of children. A young boy was rummaging around in one of the boxes when he came across a beer cooler decorated with rather explicit cartoon images of a sexual nature. He held the offending cooler in the air and yelled proudly, “Hey Mum, look what I found!” Shrimp was mortified and after the family left, banished the beer cooler to a higher location.
One of our friends, Blue, who lives locally came around on his bike with his dog Boof, in tow. While Blue wasn’t looking, I placed a price tag on his bike and also on Boof. Strangely, neither Blue nor Boof were all that impressed.
Whilst we were unsuccessful at selling a good mountain bike and a pooch, we did manage to sell the mother of all entertainment units. We were determined to get rid of it (we didn’t want to have to move it again) so only put $20 on it. We sold it to a local and being the high service garage sale operators that we were we offered to deliver it. Only in Australia would you see a pair of amateur furniture removalists, load up a giant entertainment unit on to a furniture trolley and head off trundling down the footpath to deliver it. I have first hand proof;
The day was rather successful (for entertainment value and for financial gain), although we never did sell the frog green solidified vomit jar.
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